Mr. Baisden is a hero to me for many reasons, the most important of which is that, unbeknownst to him, he has and continues to indirectly mentor me by motivating me (through his online broadcasts) to give back to my community, and the world. Although we don’t and likely will never know one another on a personal basis, his effect on me remains powerful—and not because he is some sly radio host with attractive rhetoric, but because he’s a warmhearted and noble man unafraid to speak the truth, even when it hurts others to hear.
For many weeks, in fact, Mr. Baisden has been ‘nagging’ his adult listeners to put aside some personal time and invest it in fostering a youth-mentoring relationship. Many of us—myself included—have opted to discount his plea with petty and selfish excuses:
#1. I don’t have enough time.
#2. I have plenty of my own problems.
#3. I’m just one person. How can I possibly make a difference?
I myself am tired of making excuses. It’s time to answer Mr. Baisden’s call for action by making a serious commitment to bettering the lives of our youth. But I don’t want to be the only one to undertake this journey. And so today I’m inviting all grown men and women in the Greater Triangle and beyond to take a moment to sit back, sip some coffee, and learn about youth mentoring with me.
What is youth mentoring?
Youth mentoring is a process wherein a trusted adult volunteer is matched to a confused or troubled child seeking a supportive and loving influence in his or her life. It allows the adult to chaperone the child as he or she transitions from childhood to adulthood.
What does a youth mentor do?
A youth mentor’s goal is to enrich his or her mentee’s life by serving as a confidant, an advisor, a teacher, and a friend. It is not the mentor’s job to act as either a disciplinarian or a decision-maker, as that falls to the parent. Instead the mentor helps the mentee build character, improve self-confidence and self-esteem, become more reliable and conscientious of others, and plan for the future.
Why is youth mentoring important?
According to the United States Census Bureau, 24.8% of American households in 2007 were single-parent homes. That equates to millions of children being raised by either a single mother or father. Add to that the hundreds of thousands of orphans who have neither parents nor a permanent home—not to mention those who have all three, but live in a dysfunctional family. All these children are suffering and desperately need help.
Why should I be a youth mentor?
Our lives are packed with endless responsibilities, but it is our ability to handle them effectively that gives us the right to call ourselves adults. Admittedly though, not everyone over the age of 17 deserves to be called an adult. Some of us have leaps and bounds to cross before we approach true adulthood. My assumption in writing this piece, however, is that you are an intelligent, sane, well-adjusted, and hard-working adult who pays your taxes and is interested in helping your community. The reason you haven’t already joined in a community-building activity—whether or not it is youth mentoring—is probably because you’re too busy and just can’t afford the time.
Look, I’m not going to harp on you for not participating because it’s taken me myself over 28 years of growing up to finally give a damn. I will, though, try my best to convince you that youth mentoring is definitely worth at least a little of your time.
For one, you have the power to drastically change a child’s life by serving as a much-needed mother or father figure, as well as just a good friend. In fact, according to Encyclopedia Britannica, “mentoring has been seen to be associated with positive outcomes for young people, including better school attendance and reduced propensity towards risk-taking behavior.” This in turn increases the likelihood that the child will develop into a mature and hard-working citizen with a bright future.
Of course you may ask, “I grew up with two parents and had a perfect childhood, so how can I possible relate to one of these kids?” You can relate by passing on the lessons and values that were taught to you, but that may not necessarily have been taught to your mentee. Plus mentoring a teen from a different background allows you both to expand your horizons and gain a better understanding of other people and their cultures. After all, mentoring is an opportunity for both you and the child to learn and grow together. Just because you are a successful adult doesn’t mean that you have nothing else to learn, for as Eduard C. Lindeman once said, “All of life is learning; therefore education can never end.”
All it takes is a few hours a week to make a positive difference in a child’s life. I can’t force you to care, but I hope I can at least convince you to seek further information from one or more of the following sources:
OneMillionMentors
National Mentoring Month
Mentoring
FriendsForYouth
E-Mentoring
You know, a wise woman recently said, “It takes a man to teach a boy how to be a man.” I imagine that the same principle applies to girls as well. How are these kids supposed to grow into successful adults if we are unwilling to show them the way?
Black History Part #3
Tonight I’m honoring Talib Kwali, a 34-year-old lyrical genius who stormed onto the national stage in 2002 with his hit classic ‘Get By.’ The song tells the tale of those who seek to fill their empty hearts with equally empty vices like sex, drugs, and alcohol.
“The TV got us reachin for stars
Not the ones between Venus and Mars, the ones that be readin for parts
Some people get breast enhancements and penis enlargers
Saturday sinners Sunday morning at the feet of the Father
They need somethin to rely on, we get high on all types of drug
When, all you really need is love
To get by.. just to get by
Just to get by, just to get by
Our parents sing like John Lennon, ‘Imagine all the people watch'
We rock like Paul McCartney from now until the last Beatle drop”
I would also like to urge everybody to read the William Lynch speech, which was purportedly delivered by a slave-owner during the early 1700s. Its authenticity remains forever in question, but its words certainly do not, as they ring true in regards to the way in which many black people are sometimes their own worst enemy. I cannot blame a white person for a black man’s misfortune, but I can say with certainty that a black man’s constant ‘beef’ with other black men has the potential to seriously hinder his ability to achieve that which he seeks. The truth is that we must ALL put aside our differences and learn to get along, which leads me to my next point.
Racial Division
Why does race divide us so much? I was having a conversation with a couple online friends last weekend when the issue of my race suddenly popped up, prompting a couple chatroom members to insinuate that I’ve had it easy all my life. It upset me quite a bit, especially since they presumed to know my life story based simply on my racial status. Pain and suffering have no preference, as anyone can be their victim—including a white person When we make invalid assumptions based on race, then we lose the ability to recognize other people for who they really are and what they’ve really been through, which in turn only inhibits our ability to engage in meaningful dialogue.
A Successful Weight-Loss Diet
One year ago I weighed 230lbs. Three months ago I weighed 190lbs. As of 11:45am on Friday, February 19th, 2010, I weigh 173lbs. I may perhaps be the biggest stud on the entire east coast! And since my weight-loss diet clearly works, I’m going to share it with ya’ll!
My diet consists chiefly of grilled chicken, low-fat cottage cheese, canned corn, and pretzels. In one day, I go through approximately 4 pieces of grilled chicken, 1 can of vegetables, 18oz of low-fat cottage cheese, 3 pretzel sticks, and 2 scoops of protein powder. Mind you, I break from my diet on the weekends to binge on beer, Chinese food, and pizza. I feel that you MUST reward yourself with frequent treats if you wish to remain successful—otherwise you’ll quickly grow bored and frustrated.
The reason I consume so much low-fat cottage cheese is because it’s a slow-synthesizing protein that takes anywhere from 4-8 hours to fully digest. It’s especially beneficial to eat cottage cheese right before bed; it’ll ensure that your body stays adequately supplied with amino acids as you slumber. Keep in mind, however, that if your goal is merely weight-loss (and not bodybuilding), then you won’t need to eat nearly as much food as I do.
Anyway. If you’re serious about losing weight, then switch from beef, pork, and fried chicken to grilled chicken. It’s extremely low in fat, but high in protein. Also keep an eye out on your carb, sugar, and sodium intake as well. Reducing your fat intake, managing your carbohydrate consumption, exercising frequently, getting enough rest, and EATING AT LEAST THREE MEALS A DAY each play a pivotal role in a successful weight-loss diet.
Sarah Palin vs Family Guy
I understand why Miss Palin is upset at Seth McFarland. I myself used to fume with rage when others mocked my own mental conditions. But as I grew older and more mature, I realized that it makes no sense to take it personally when someone takes a meaningless jab at my personality or my behavior. And more importantly, a comedian is not obliged to take my feelings into consideration before he or she cracks a joke. So if I can’t take the heat, I just turn the channel and find something else to watch! This is, in fact, the very reason I never read the replies to my post on craigslist. Instead of taking the risk of being hurt, I just ignore them and move on.
Quite frankly (and I hate to sound so cynical), I feel that Miss Palin needs to hop off her high horse—so high that she can see Russia from Alaska while on it—and, excuse my slang, take a chill pill.
Plus, Family Guy in no way, shape, or form actually ridiculed her son. The character Andrea Fay Friedman—who herself is afflicted with a handicap—played was merely a bitchy albeit highly intelligent girl with Down's Syndrome. They key word here is girl. Unless Miss Palin's son was in fact born a girl (which I suppose is possible), there is no actual correlation between him and 'Ellen' other than some harmless political satire.
The Untouchables of India
One Indian issue that I am very passionate about is the suffering that the untouchables endure. Rural Indian culture is based on an antiquated caste system wherein those at the bottom are considered polluted, unclean, and untouchable. Although discrimination based on one’s caste position has been illegal since India gained its independence in 1947, it is still widely practiced—despite the fact that Mohatmas Ghandi himself considered the untouchables to be ‘people of God.’ It is in indeed a wise man that once said that the meek shall inherit the Earth.
Anyway. I would love to approach one of the so-called ‘touchables’ with a pair of my best shoes on and say, “Look at my shoes. Now look at your crusty-ass feet in them old-ass sandals. You ain’t better than me or anyone else, you piece of hatin’ass scum!” Sorry, but cannot stand aristocratic or bougie people.
Is Boston racist?
Many of my online friends claim that Boston is a racist city. I speculate that their belief is wrong. It's not that Boston is racist; rather, Boston is probably just quite segregated, in that people of similar backgrounds (Protestant Irish, Italians, Asians, Blacks, Caucasians) perhaps tend to stick together. I don't particularly find that racist or disturbing, although it certainly isn’t an ideal situation.
Truthfully, I prefer to spend time around people with whom I can relate with well. Why would I want to spend time with somebody who is the opposite of me? For instance, my brother is a ‘progressive liberal’ from Portland who loves permaculture and Burning Man; and although we’re cool and will always be cool, we oftentimes don’t get along due to our widely differing views on politics and life. Spending time with him is worse than listening to some chump run his fingernails across a chalkboard. At the end of the day though, we still respect one another.
The same principle applies to anybody. It’s important to be tolerant of others, but that doesn’t mean you have to spend time with somebody or even like them, for that matter. Just show them the respect that they’re due and it’s all good.
By the way, what is the bloody point of gardening? Every summer my parents build a HUGE garden full of tomatoes, zucchini, carrots, gerbils, and whatever else grows out of the damn ground. And then three to six months later, all the plants die. I’m sorry, but it just makes no sense to a simpleton like me!
Jokes
I’ve decided to cease posting my potty-mouth jokes because some people feel that they are ‘trashy.’ I agree with this sentiment because such humor isn’t really appropriate for this venue. I would like to make clear, however, that in real life, I am as trashy as they get. I wear ol’-ass dingy shoes, my elbows are ashier than chalk, and my webos always stink, even after I shower. (And yes, I said webbos. If George Lopez can say it on Nickelodeon, I can say it on Craigslist!) At the end of the day, I’m just a low-down piece of American trash, but by golly, I’m damn proud of who I am!
I know the gifs are getting old, but I’m honestly out of witty comments. And that’s why I’m probably going to do like Wanda Sykes and take a week off, so don’t expect anything next week!
pEaCe
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